2001-02-12 - Lunch
I don�t smoke ... tobacco. Except for a couple of times in college when I took a drag on someone else�s cigarette while drunk, I never have. (Cigars are another story, although those rare occasions where I�ve lit up a cigar have mostly been for dramatic effect--there are some photos floating around the web of me chomping on a stogie and wielding a bullwhip, but I�m not going to tell you where they are.) I�ve got no patience with some smokers� "Help! Help! I�m being repressed!"-style wanking about their "right" to spew their exhaust in my face in public, and if the CEOs of Phillip Morris and R.J. Reynolds both cough up tar-soaked chunks of lung and die the next time they lie to Congress about marketing nicotine addiction to preschoolers, I won�t cry.
But this is just plain silly:
"The San Diego City Council, after being lobbied by a local anti-smoking group, recently passed a law that bans smoking near playgrounds. ... The American Lung Association of San Diego and Imperial Counties plans to approach the popular tourist destinations, such as SeaWorld and the San Diego Zoo, to ask them to go smoke-free. ... It also plans to lobby the San Diego City Council to consider a smoking ban on beaches." The article adds, "Some say outdoor public smoking should be banned because of the message adult smokers unintentionally send to children."
Me, I think outdoor public farting should be banned. If you think secondhand smoke is toxic, try sitting in a wheelchair all day and breathing in the gaseous emissions of every fatass that waddles by. It�s not the meateaters who smell the worst, either; if Mister Vegan Activist out there thinks his daily diet of raw tofu, black beans and cabbage leaves him with honeysuckles shooting out of his rectum, he needs to bend over and take a whiff.
The war on tobacco isn�t about public health anymore--it�s about good old-fashioned American puritanism. California in particular breeds two types of puritans whose agendas intersect neatly where smoking is concerned: the Health Nazis who no longer get invited to dinner because putting anything in front of them that tastes good will trigger a lecture, and the Boomer parents who will not rest until the whole world is turned into Disneyland for the sake of Their Children. (Not "Our" Children, please--I don�t have kids, I don�t want kids, and hell if I�m going to be made responsible for theirs.)
Beyond that, I have to wonder how many carcinogens these people suck in every day while they�re stuck on I-8 at rush hour. Just an idle thought.
Anyway, I have bluelines to look at. Pour me another gin and tonic, will you?
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