2001-03-10 - Evening
Lesson for the Day: Avoid vegetarian bacon. I don�t know what the hell possessed me. The stuff looked good enough in the package, and while I do eat and enjoy the taste of meat, I know and respect enough people who don�t (and who aren�t shrieking Veganazis) to convince me that lowering my meat intake is a worthwhile idea.
But ... but ... but. Vegetarian bacon is an abomination. Its mere existence spits on and defiles all the laws of God, man and good taste. Bacon Day is meant for only one thing, and that�s bacon. Not rubbery strips of soy protein pretending to be bacon and failing pathetically no matter how much fake smoke flavoring they drown themselves in. In the name of everything good and decent, DO NOT MESS WITH BACON DAY!
Here endeth the lesson.
***
Went to DLove�s art opening last night. This is a guy I happened across about a week ago while looking to see if there were any other D�landers in San Diego--his page has a link to some of his art, and I was impressed enough by it to send him some e-mail. He then e-mailed me back to invite me to his show, which turned out to be about a 10-minute drive away, and here we are.
(So, to all those neo-Luddite morons who�ve been blithering for the last five years about about how the Internet is turning us all into social atoms who never interact in real life anymore, here�s another big fat fuck-you from Casa de Miguelito. Try not to eat your crow all at once.)
The show was great. I wish I knew more about art--I know what speaks to me and what doesn�t, and that�s pretty much it. And since I�d rather keep my piehole shut than open it and let something stupid escape, I tend to be very nontalkative at art shows. You can always tell if I like a piece, however, by the number of times I come back to it or how long I sit there staring at it slack-jawed. I was doing a lot of both last night. It was intense.
D seems like a nice guy, too (and a snappy dresser to boot). He says I�m a funny guy. I thought about responding with my hilarious Joe-Pesci-in-Goodfellas impersonation, but I�ve found it wise to hold back some of my material until people I�ve just met get my humor, otherwise I frighten them.
Judging from D�s diary, he also seems to get almost as much poontang as Badsnake does (albeit in a strictly heterosexual sense). Damn. I sure do know my share of preeverts, don�t I? Not that I�m complaining. Far from it.
After I take over the world, I think I�ll become the Chairman Kaga of sex. I�ll dress outrageously, build a huge sexatorium--let�s call it Bedroom Stadium--recruit the best lays from all over the globe and have them compete against upstart challengers. Tonight�s theme ingredient is--CUCUMBER. Allez Cuisine!
***
|
 |